Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Smart, Independent Girls Only Need Apply

The blond twin drives me crazy. She battles with me about everything. Nothing is off-limits when it comes to her ability to question my actions or decisions. Sometimes she's just mad that she didn't get her way. Other times she just wants more information.

One day when I was particularly frustrated, my husband looked at me and said, "We're raising two smart, strong-willed, independent young women. Isn't that what we want?"

I had to admit he was right. 

If there's one thing that we want for the girls, it's for them to be strong, independent and smart. It's one reason we are so happy that they are reading Harry Potter. I adore Hermoine as a role model. I just read an article where the author talked about how she was one of the first modern characters who never shut off her brains to be more popular. I can think of other books with smart girls, such as Nancy Drew, but I'm not sure young girls read Nancy Drew any more.

Whenever she battles with me now, I have to remind myself that we want her to be smart. We want her to question why we're doing things so she understands the details as appropriate. We give them the background they need to understand our expectations. In some situations they have to use more formal manners while others are more fun and casual. They understand how to dress and what is expected in terms of patience. We find that the more information they have, the better the day goes.

Sometimes though, I just want her to do what I want her to do. I don't want everything to be a discussion as much as I sometimes just want compliance. I have to remember that in striking out for her independence, the blond twin is simply growing up, whether I like it or not.

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